Savannah Watson

Like all forms of confidence, I think people fall into one of two categories: born with an ungodly amount or born without a drop. I fall into the “born without” category. For people who also fall into this category, you should know that confidence is something you have to work at – whether it’s confidence in how you look, confidence to do public speaking, or confidence in your hobbies.

I have found that confidence is a learned skill, one I am still learning.

I have never been a confident person, in virtually any part of myself or my life. Since childhood, I’ve had intense social anxiety and horribly low self-confidence, and my desire to be a writer was in constant conflict with my confidence. The idea of sharing my writing was so insanely crippling, but without sharing it, how would I become the writer I wanted to be? A paradox, I know.

And the further irony of it is that the more I have shared my writing, the more confident I have become as a writer.

I have found that being confident means being vulnerable without letting your view of yourself be affected by the opinions (real or imagined) of others. Now, that does not mean completely ignoring other people’s suggestions or critiques. What it does mean is that your self-worth should not be wrapped up in other people’s commentary.

Even more difficult, and what I regularly struggle with, is not letting your inner critic affect your self-worth. My inner critic is harsher than any person I have ever shared my writing with, and that girl can take me down ten pegs in a few seconds… it would actually be kind of impressive if she wasn’t such a bitch.

Learning to be confident in my writing has all boiled down to practice – putting it out there and risking the feedback while remembering that self-worth should not hinge on whether people like it or not (easier said than done, I know). And when I do receive feedback, I always remind myself that it is not a personal attack, it is constructive criticism, and people have different views, tastes, and opinions (and that’s perfectly okay!). I have also found that building yourself up, being proud of yourself, and celebrating what you’ve done well all go a long way to re-enforcing confidence.

I may not always think I’m a good writer, I may get imposter syndrome, and I may just hate my writing (and myself) some days, but I have definitely made large strides over the past few years toward being a more confident writer (and person). And that is something I can be proud of!

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